Last week during the Music & Arts Camp, we had many youth helpers on campus. They did a GREAT job, better than any other group of youth workers I have ever dealt with (and I've worked with a fair share). One of the workers was assigned to be my personal helper. During a conversation with her, I began to explain that hers was a bit of a harder job than the youth workers who were assigned to a specific class. Those workers always knew what they were to do, what their assignments were. She, on the other hand, had times where she was just hanging out, waiting for a need to surface. Her job was to be available, and though she would have more slow periods than the other youth, when the calls came, her jobs would often be more important to the function of the camp that of the youth in the classrooms.
Even as I reached this conclusion, I realized that this lesson applied to life, my life at least. What I have wanted, where I thought I was going, was a life where my responsibilities were clear and defined, with no lag time left over. What God called me to do was to be available and ready. I don't know that this ends up being more important, but for me, it does end up being harder. If I were a missionary on the field now, I would know my path, my responsibilities (generally); if I were married, someone else would be in the lead. But as it is, God has called me to pull back and simply be available. That is a tougher task, but it is my calling nontheless. Sometimes I wonder what will come out of this--something great? something wonderful? valuable?--but I suppose it's not mine to know. So I'll focus on being ready, on being available, and know that the defined tasks belong to others, at least for now.
-J
(c) 2007
Monday, June 11, 2007
Music & Arts Camp As History
Okay, well, I just ran out of time and energy last week and couldn't post anymore. The camp went fairly well, wrapping up with a showcase on Friday night. Overall, things went smoothly, but frankly, I am a-worn out, still. I wasn't able to sleep much this weekend, just couldn't get my body to do it. Maybe I can catch up some this week, but really I need to CLEAN MY HOUSE! It is yuck! And, my mom is coming for a visit this weekend. Which is really wonderful, but I really would prefer that my house not be gross when she arrives. :-)
Thanks to those of you who prayed and supported me through this time. I am hoping to return to 40-hour work weeks now, not the 60-70 hours I have been working. I am tired just thinking about next year...ooooooiiiieeee!
-J
(c) 2007
Thanks to those of you who prayed and supported me through this time. I am hoping to return to 40-hour work weeks now, not the 60-70 hours I have been working. I am tired just thinking about next year...ooooooiiiieeee!
-J
(c) 2007
Wednesday, June 6, 2007
Meeting in the Details
You know, I love when God meets us in small ways. Yesterday, I was doing pretty well until I had to spend an hour on my feet shopping for our Music & Arts Camp AFTER I had already worked a 10-1/2 hour day (mostly on my feet). My knees were killing me (old injury) and I was just hobbling around these stores trying to find what I needed, and in the absence of finding it, trying to improvise.
I ended up at Wal-Mart, and since I went in to just get a couple of things, I didn't grab a cart (known as a 'buggy' in the South). By the time I had looped most of the store, my arms were literally full, and my knee ached so much I wasn't walking to the door to get a cart. But I *NEEDED* a salad (I've eaten almost no vegetables/fruit for the past 4-5 days and my body is not happy for it! It's very unusual for me, but I've been so busy...)
So I'm standing in front of the lettuce bags and I literally turn to a stranger standing there and say, "I'm sorry, but could I ask a favor? I didn't get a basket when I came in. Could you put a bag of lettuce on top of my pile?" She takes one look at me and says, "Here, take mine," and gives me her (almost empty) basket and goes and gets another one for herself. By this point, I've worked 12 hours, and I hurt and I'm tired, and I was just so grateful and encouraged by this one woman's generosity, so freely given that she MUST have been a believer. There was no hesitancy at all. Or maybe she was an angel. :-) I just know that I was so blessed by her kindness.
He is beautiful, even in the little things... :-)
-J
(c) 2007
I ended up at Wal-Mart, and since I went in to just get a couple of things, I didn't grab a cart (known as a 'buggy' in the South). By the time I had looped most of the store, my arms were literally full, and my knee ached so much I wasn't walking to the door to get a cart. But I *NEEDED* a salad (I've eaten almost no vegetables/fruit for the past 4-5 days and my body is not happy for it! It's very unusual for me, but I've been so busy...)
So I'm standing in front of the lettuce bags and I literally turn to a stranger standing there and say, "I'm sorry, but could I ask a favor? I didn't get a basket when I came in. Could you put a bag of lettuce on top of my pile?" She takes one look at me and says, "Here, take mine," and gives me her (almost empty) basket and goes and gets another one for herself. By this point, I've worked 12 hours, and I hurt and I'm tired, and I was just so grateful and encouraged by this one woman's generosity, so freely given that she MUST have been a believer. There was no hesitancy at all. Or maybe she was an angel. :-) I just know that I was so blessed by her kindness.
He is beautiful, even in the little things... :-)
-J
(c) 2007
Tuesday, June 5, 2007
Music & Arts Camp, Day 2
June 05, 2007 - Music & Arts Camp, Day 2
Wow, so much better! I am not nearly as worn out, and things seemed to be rolling right along. Yea!
Thank you, Father.
-J
(c) 2007
Wow, so much better! I am not nearly as worn out, and things seemed to be rolling right along. Yea!
Thank you, Father.
-J
(c) 2007
Sixty (Stolen) Questions
Okay, I've seen lots of these go around and figured I'd finally get into the act. So I stole them from my friend's blog. I didn't see a (c), so.... LOL! Let's see...
1)How old do you wish you were? I kinda like now; anytime between 30 and now (34).
2) Where were you when 9/11 happened? At work. I worked at a church then. We got a call when the first plane hit, so they turned on a TV and had everyone gather around. At this point, remember, we don't know it's a terrorist attack; it seems like a terrible plane accident. I remember thinking, "Why did they call us together to see this? Bad things have happened before and we didn't stop the work day." We went back to work and a few minutes later...well, you know. It was an awful, awful day. I still won't watch things that reference that day/week/month. I still cry thinking about it.
3) What do you do when vending machines steal your money? Push the refund button. If that fails, well, I just walk away.
4) Do you consider yourself kind? I think I'm generally so. I try hard to be.
5) If you had to get a tattoo, where would it be? If? You think I don't have one? I am a woman of mystery.
6) If you could be fluent in any other language what would it be? Probably Spanish just for practicality's sake, but I'd rather be fluent in Russian or French. French is beautiful and Russian so interesting. What I'd really like is to be able to speak whatever language is being spoken. Wouldn't that be a cool superhero power?!
7) Do you know your neighbors? Yes and no. Two of my neighbors are *very* close friends, but the rest I only know so-so. Go two houses down and I don't know them at all. :-(
8)What do you consider a vacation? Traveling away from home and exploring someplace new. No offense, but I don't consider visiting family a vacation. I have rarely had vacations in my life, even as a child.
9) Do you follow your horoscope? Nope
10) Would you move for the person you loved? Absolutely.
11) Are you touchy feely? Occasionally, but not generally.
12) Do you believe that opposites attract? Often, but not always. I think it makes things interesting, but not always smooth.
13) Dream job? Wife, mother, discipler.
14) Favorite channel(s)? With cable, HGTV. Since we don't have cable, channel 10. LOL! Okay, NBC.
15) Favorite place to go on weekends? I rarely go anywhere. Sad for someone who likes to travel so much.
16) Showers or Baths? Always showers. I don't enjoy baths at all.
17) Do you paint your nails? No. My nails hate all forms of remover, and my eyes hate chipped nails.
18) Do you trust people easily? Depends. To a certain degree, I afford everyone trust immediately, but on a deep level, very rarely.
19) What are your phobias? Hmmm....I can kinda get carried away on germ-free hands, but I can turn that off if I need to.
20) Do you want kids? Yes. I'd love to have bunches (assuming I still have the energy to manage them), and I'd love to adopt from all over. Think Angelina Jolie, only I'd be married.
21) Do you keep a handwritten journal? Periodically. It's not usually what is happening, it's more what I'm thinking or learning, especially spiritually. Kinda like my blog.
22) Where would you rather be right now? New Zealand, Europe, in the mountains. You name it, I'm there!
23) What makes you feel warm and safe? Hmmmm....No special thing usually.
24) Heavy or light sleep? Heeeeaaaavvvvyyyy.
25) Are you paranoid? Who's asking?
26) Are you impatient? Sometimes yes, sometimes no.
27) What is your favorite candle smell? linen
28) How do you feel about interracial couples? Love them! Wish I was one. My babies deserve to have some dark-skinned genes mixed in with my pasty ones. To pass on such pasty-ness is surely cruel and unusual punishment.
29) Have you been burned by love? Not really. More like...not yet found. :-)
30) Whats your life motto? When in doubt, don't. (from Romans 14) I'm working hard on it being something more like, "Seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you."
31) What's your main ring tone on your mobile? Ringing. I don't hear the other rings.
32) What were you doing at midnight last night? This is unusual, but I was actually sleeping. Music Camp wore me out.
33) Who was your last text message from? I don't usually text, but one of my aunts does all the time.
34) Who's bed did you sleep in last night? Mine, and mine alone. :-)
35) What color shirt are you wearing? Granny Smith Apple Green (It looks pretty awful on me, but it matches the color of the Camp shirts, and I didn't have time to wash mine from yesterday.)
36) Who is your favorite artist? Name an impressionist.
37) Name three things you have on you at all times? Watch, ring, and earrings.
38) Are you wearing underwear? Always.
39) How much cash do you have on you right now? About $60. That's my food budget for the next 10 days.
40) What is your favorite part of the chicken? Breast
41) What's your favorite town/city? Chicago!
42) Who got you to join Yahoo 360? Me. I was looking for a free space to blog.
43) What did you have for dinner last night? Applebee's appetizer sampler, split with my best friend.
44) How tall are you bare foot? I claim 5'9".
45) Have you ever smoked heroin? What an odd question. Don't you smoke crack and snort heroin? Anyway, the answer to both questions is no.
46) Do you own a gun? No, and don't plan to. Don't mind if others do so responsibly, but I don't feel the need to.
47) What do you prefer to drink in the morning? Coffee, strong, with one sweet-n-low, and lots of French vanilla creamer. It should be the color of caramel.
48) Do you have A.D.D.? I'm sorry, what did you say?
49) What time did you wake up today? 6:20-ish. VERY unusual for me. This is because of music camp. Usually I wake up around 7:45/8:00 a.m.
50) Current worry? Paying off stupid (aka, credit card) debt. I've come so far, but have so far to go.
51) Current hate? This is silly, but I hate having an exhaust fan on when taking a shower. I really like to steam up the bathroom.
52) Favorite place to be? One of my favorite places to be is the public library. What a great invention. I also like being at the Biltmore (Asheville, NC).
53) Where would you like to travel? You name it and pay for it, and I'm there!
54) Where do you think you'll be in 10 yrs? I'm afraid to answer this question.
55) Last thing you ate? Soft peppermint candy.
56) Song that you sing in the shower? I don't usually sing in the shower, but if I do, it would usually be a worship song, or maybe something from old Broadway.
57) Last person that made you laugh? Some of the youth workers at our camp this week.
58) Worst injury you've ever had? Having my gallbladder removed was awful. I'm pretty sure he botched something, but I eventually recovered, mostly.
59) Does someone have a crush on you? One can only wish...
60) What is your favorite candy? Varies daily.
-J
1)How old do you wish you were? I kinda like now; anytime between 30 and now (34).
2) Where were you when 9/11 happened? At work. I worked at a church then. We got a call when the first plane hit, so they turned on a TV and had everyone gather around. At this point, remember, we don't know it's a terrorist attack; it seems like a terrible plane accident. I remember thinking, "Why did they call us together to see this? Bad things have happened before and we didn't stop the work day." We went back to work and a few minutes later...well, you know. It was an awful, awful day. I still won't watch things that reference that day/week/month. I still cry thinking about it.
3) What do you do when vending machines steal your money? Push the refund button. If that fails, well, I just walk away.
4) Do you consider yourself kind? I think I'm generally so. I try hard to be.
5) If you had to get a tattoo, where would it be? If? You think I don't have one? I am a woman of mystery.
6) If you could be fluent in any other language what would it be? Probably Spanish just for practicality's sake, but I'd rather be fluent in Russian or French. French is beautiful and Russian so interesting. What I'd really like is to be able to speak whatever language is being spoken. Wouldn't that be a cool superhero power?!
7) Do you know your neighbors? Yes and no. Two of my neighbors are *very* close friends, but the rest I only know so-so. Go two houses down and I don't know them at all. :-(
8)What do you consider a vacation? Traveling away from home and exploring someplace new. No offense, but I don't consider visiting family a vacation. I have rarely had vacations in my life, even as a child.
9) Do you follow your horoscope? Nope
10) Would you move for the person you loved? Absolutely.
11) Are you touchy feely? Occasionally, but not generally.
12) Do you believe that opposites attract? Often, but not always. I think it makes things interesting, but not always smooth.
13) Dream job? Wife, mother, discipler.
14) Favorite channel(s)? With cable, HGTV. Since we don't have cable, channel 10. LOL! Okay, NBC.
15) Favorite place to go on weekends? I rarely go anywhere. Sad for someone who likes to travel so much.
16) Showers or Baths? Always showers. I don't enjoy baths at all.
17) Do you paint your nails? No. My nails hate all forms of remover, and my eyes hate chipped nails.
18) Do you trust people easily? Depends. To a certain degree, I afford everyone trust immediately, but on a deep level, very rarely.
19) What are your phobias? Hmmm....I can kinda get carried away on germ-free hands, but I can turn that off if I need to.
20) Do you want kids? Yes. I'd love to have bunches (assuming I still have the energy to manage them), and I'd love to adopt from all over. Think Angelina Jolie, only I'd be married.
21) Do you keep a handwritten journal? Periodically. It's not usually what is happening, it's more what I'm thinking or learning, especially spiritually. Kinda like my blog.
22) Where would you rather be right now? New Zealand, Europe, in the mountains. You name it, I'm there!
23) What makes you feel warm and safe? Hmmmm....No special thing usually.
24) Heavy or light sleep? Heeeeaaaavvvvyyyy.
25) Are you paranoid? Who's asking?
26) Are you impatient? Sometimes yes, sometimes no.
27) What is your favorite candle smell? linen
28) How do you feel about interracial couples? Love them! Wish I was one. My babies deserve to have some dark-skinned genes mixed in with my pasty ones. To pass on such pasty-ness is surely cruel and unusual punishment.
29) Have you been burned by love? Not really. More like...not yet found. :-)
30) Whats your life motto? When in doubt, don't. (from Romans 14) I'm working hard on it being something more like, "Seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you."
31) What's your main ring tone on your mobile? Ringing. I don't hear the other rings.
32) What were you doing at midnight last night? This is unusual, but I was actually sleeping. Music Camp wore me out.
33) Who was your last text message from? I don't usually text, but one of my aunts does all the time.
34) Who's bed did you sleep in last night? Mine, and mine alone. :-)
35) What color shirt are you wearing? Granny Smith Apple Green (It looks pretty awful on me, but it matches the color of the Camp shirts, and I didn't have time to wash mine from yesterday.)
36) Who is your favorite artist? Name an impressionist.
37) Name three things you have on you at all times? Watch, ring, and earrings.
38) Are you wearing underwear? Always.
39) How much cash do you have on you right now? About $60. That's my food budget for the next 10 days.
40) What is your favorite part of the chicken? Breast
41) What's your favorite town/city? Chicago!
42) Who got you to join Yahoo 360? Me. I was looking for a free space to blog.
43) What did you have for dinner last night? Applebee's appetizer sampler, split with my best friend.
44) How tall are you bare foot? I claim 5'9".
45) Have you ever smoked heroin? What an odd question. Don't you smoke crack and snort heroin? Anyway, the answer to both questions is no.
46) Do you own a gun? No, and don't plan to. Don't mind if others do so responsibly, but I don't feel the need to.
47) What do you prefer to drink in the morning? Coffee, strong, with one sweet-n-low, and lots of French vanilla creamer. It should be the color of caramel.
48) Do you have A.D.D.? I'm sorry, what did you say?
49) What time did you wake up today? 6:20-ish. VERY unusual for me. This is because of music camp. Usually I wake up around 7:45/8:00 a.m.
50) Current worry? Paying off stupid (aka, credit card) debt. I've come so far, but have so far to go.
51) Current hate? This is silly, but I hate having an exhaust fan on when taking a shower. I really like to steam up the bathroom.
52) Favorite place to be? One of my favorite places to be is the public library. What a great invention. I also like being at the Biltmore (Asheville, NC).
53) Where would you like to travel? You name it and pay for it, and I'm there!
54) Where do you think you'll be in 10 yrs? I'm afraid to answer this question.
55) Last thing you ate? Soft peppermint candy.
56) Song that you sing in the shower? I don't usually sing in the shower, but if I do, it would usually be a worship song, or maybe something from old Broadway.
57) Last person that made you laugh? Some of the youth workers at our camp this week.
58) Worst injury you've ever had? Having my gallbladder removed was awful. I'm pretty sure he botched something, but I eventually recovered, mostly.
59) Does someone have a crush on you? One can only wish...
60) What is your favorite candy? Varies daily.
-J
Monday, June 4, 2007
Music & Arts Camp, Day 1
Well, I've made it through day 1 of our Music & Arts Camp. I'm the music administrator, so a lot of the responsibility for the event has fallen to me. It was good, but here it what I realized today: I am OLD! Oh my goodness. I was tired out before the morning was half over! Okay, okay, maybe some of that had to do with the fact that I worked 7 hours yesterday (Sunday), and many 10-12 hour days in recent weeks, but STILL! I'm going to have to join a gym before next year's camp or I won't make it! LOL!
The only hard part is having to say no to the parents who want their kids moved (classes are full and closed) or, worse yet, want their kid enrolled (registration ended over 3 weeks ago). I know we even have a couple of kids who were very upset today, but I don't know how to help them without opening Pandora's box, so to speak. Oh well, 99% happiness will have to do I suppose. :-)
Well... I'm gonna drag my tired hiney back to work for a little bit to prepare for tomorrow. Then, I'm gonna head home. (I have to wash my shirt asap, as I sweated a good bit today. Nasty!) The good news is...I'm gonna sleep well tonight! LOL!
-J
(c) 2007
The only hard part is having to say no to the parents who want their kids moved (classes are full and closed) or, worse yet, want their kid enrolled (registration ended over 3 weeks ago). I know we even have a couple of kids who were very upset today, but I don't know how to help them without opening Pandora's box, so to speak. Oh well, 99% happiness will have to do I suppose. :-)
Well... I'm gonna drag my tired hiney back to work for a little bit to prepare for tomorrow. Then, I'm gonna head home. (I have to wash my shirt asap, as I sweated a good bit today. Nasty!) The good news is...I'm gonna sleep well tonight! LOL!
-J
(c) 2007
Sunday, June 3, 2007
My Friend
Today is the birthday of one of my dearest friends. She lives far from me, and we haven't seen each other in several years, but she is still one of the most special people in my life.
When I think back over the 23 years we have been friends, I see some really good reasons why we are (still) friends:
1. We share history. That little saying that says "New friends are silver, but old friends are gold," is absolutely accurate. I can look to her and know that she "remembers when," knows my family, understands the circumstances surrounding my growing up. She's seen me be selfish and ugly, frightened, anxious, and sad. She's seen me wrestle with my sins, and (hopefully!) grow. She has held me up when I needed support, and she's done so without ever asking for anything in response.
2. She is faithful. She wouldn't let me go. I am a lousy communicator and a lousy initiator. She never let my failures stand in the way of our friendship. She called me, wrote me, even sent me packages. She is the reason our friendship has remained. I hate that it is true, but my weakness would have let such a valuable relationship slip away. She was strong in place of my weakness. For her faithfulness, I could not be more grateful.
3. She is beautiful. Though she is beautiful physically, I am most grateful for her beautiful spirit. She brings beauty, joy, and grace to those around her. She offers of herself in so many ways. Here is an example of her thoughtfulness. When I lived overseas, so far from home at Christmas, I received from her and her mother a GIGANTIC box filled with all things Christmas, including a small tree with ornaments, candy canes, and even pictures drawn by the children in her daycare. Ooooiiieeee, I cried! It was wonderful! My students in Korea were stunned and my co-workers jealous, but I was just so thankful to have her for a friend.
There are so many more reasons why I am glad to have her as my friend, but today, especially, I just want to say,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, RACHEL! You live a life worth living. And I love you.
-J
When I think back over the 23 years we have been friends, I see some really good reasons why we are (still) friends:
1. We share history. That little saying that says "New friends are silver, but old friends are gold," is absolutely accurate. I can look to her and know that she "remembers when," knows my family, understands the circumstances surrounding my growing up. She's seen me be selfish and ugly, frightened, anxious, and sad. She's seen me wrestle with my sins, and (hopefully!) grow. She has held me up when I needed support, and she's done so without ever asking for anything in response.
2. She is faithful. She wouldn't let me go. I am a lousy communicator and a lousy initiator. She never let my failures stand in the way of our friendship. She called me, wrote me, even sent me packages. She is the reason our friendship has remained. I hate that it is true, but my weakness would have let such a valuable relationship slip away. She was strong in place of my weakness. For her faithfulness, I could not be more grateful.
3. She is beautiful. Though she is beautiful physically, I am most grateful for her beautiful spirit. She brings beauty, joy, and grace to those around her. She offers of herself in so many ways. Here is an example of her thoughtfulness. When I lived overseas, so far from home at Christmas, I received from her and her mother a GIGANTIC box filled with all things Christmas, including a small tree with ornaments, candy canes, and even pictures drawn by the children in her daycare. Ooooiiieeee, I cried! It was wonderful! My students in Korea were stunned and my co-workers jealous, but I was just so thankful to have her for a friend.
There are so many more reasons why I am glad to have her as my friend, but today, especially, I just want to say,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, RACHEL! You live a life worth living. And I love you.
-J
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